The Gravy Boat

Have Zucchini, Will Bake

Zucchini, Onion, and Havarti Tart

The impetus for this savory tart is a full raised bed +several containers of quickly pollinating summer squash plants.  If you’re considering this tart, you’ve either a)overzealously planted summer squash like I did or b) you have a friend or relative who has and wanted to unload this bounty upon you.

Unlike the tomato, which I could eat undoctored and raw three times a day all summer long, the zucchini needs some enhancement after you have grilled, steamed, frittered, sauteed, and juiced it.  So here’s a savory tart to help you attempt to deplete those summer squashes that will soon be taking over your back yard.

The tart dough is a fantastically easy crust that’s unfussy and doesn’t require a food processor or ice cubes or even a pie pan- the original recipe is here at New World Geek (and the fruit galette recipes that are included with it are excellent as well). The filling should take advantage of whatever extra vegetables you have lying around- I have made this tart with tomatoes, mushrooms, and yellow squash so far, and I’m sad to report that SOMEone will probably soon start asking for a disgusting roasted beet tart. But YOU should use whatever vegetables you like the taste of when they are roasted.

Ingredients

Dough

• 1.5 cups flour
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 8 tablespoons butter (yep that’s a whole stick), cut into 16 tiny cubes
• 4 tablespoons water, plus a little more
• 1 egg, beaten (optional- makes it shiny)
• Parchment paper

Filling (this is HIGHLY variable- experiment!)

• 2 medium sized zucchini, sliced
• 1/2 a medium sized onion, sliced
• 1.5 TB olive oil (give or take- don’t make it too greasy!)
• Salt and Pepper to taste
• a few ounces of havarti cheese, cubed (yeah, you can grate it, but havarti is soft and annoying to grate and who has time to remember to freeze it before they want to grate it? not me, especially when I’m making this at breakfast)

Directions

Make the Filling

1. Preheat oven to 400 F.
2. Place vegetables on a cookie sheet and drizzle olive oil over them- rub them around with your hands to get an even coating.
3. Sprinkle with salt and pepper.
4. Roast until browned, about 20 minutes.
5. Allow to cool while you make the dough.

Make the Dough

1.  In a medium sized bowl, mix the flour and salt.
2.  Sprinkle the butter on top of the dry ingredients and avoid the temptation to eat one of the butter cubes.

3.  Using your hands, work the butter into the flour until it resembles chunky sand.    You can use a pastry blender or a two knives, but your hands will work just fine.  This takes all of 5 minutes, so have a quick fake fight in your head with someone who deserves a good ass whipping and your dough will be done in no time.

4.  Start by sprinkling 4 tablespoons of water over the dough and mix with a non-stick spatula/spoon.  This is a minimum number, wholly dependent on the planetary alignment of the day.  The dough should be sticky enough to form into  a ball but not SO sticky that you won’t be able to press it into a thin layer.  So add more water by the half tablespoon.  This particular tart took 6 TB of water, but just pay attention to the malleability of the dough rather than numbers.  If you got excited and added too much water, just add a bit more flour and you’ll be fine.

5.  Form the dough into a rough ball and place on parchment paper on a workspace.  Roll it out til it’s about 1/2” thick.  I don’t even have a rolling pin and I achieved this with a tall cocktail glass.  That’s how unfussy this dough is.

6.  Put your vegetable filling in the middle of the dough.
7.  Put the cheese chunks on top of that.
8.  Fold up the tart in whatever shape you want.
9.  Brush with beaten egg
10. Place parchment and tart on a cookie sheet and bake until golden, 25-35 minutes.

11. DO NOT eat immediately.  You will burn the hell out of your throat. Let cool about 10 minutes and then bask in the appreciation of whomever you’re going to share this with.

When In Doubt Red Beans and Rice

This is a recipe for quick red beans and rice.  Yes, yes, purists have particular steps and processes and spices, but I have to say, this is country food, and that means to me that you are using up what you have in your fridge, and tonight, my fridge had:

1 lb Polska Kielbasa (though andouille is really preferable), sliced into chunks small enough for your mouth

1  green bell pepper, chopped

1 white onion, chopped

2 stalks celery, chopped

2 cloves garlic, minced

2-3 tsps Creole seasoning

2 cans kidney beans, drained and rinsed

2 c water

1 c white rice

2 c water

Your fave cornbread recipe (Southern corn bread doesn’t have sugar)

Directions

1. Saute onions, bell pepper, and celery until tender in a Dutch oven.  Add garlic and stir.
2. Add sausage slices and cook till things are getting juicy.
3. Add beans to pot.
4. Add Creole seasoning and stir to coat everything.
5. Add some (~2 c) water. Bring to a boil, then turn down the heat to simmer and things start to thicken up a bit.
6. Meanwhile, steam some rice.  Put 1 c rice into medium sized pot and pour 2 c water on top.  Bring to a boil.  Cover and reduce heat to low. Steam for about 20 minutes.
7. While the rice steams, there should be enough time to make the cornbread (just let the rice sit and the beans to simmer while you finish up the cornbread).
8. Like all stew-ish type meals, this is even better the next day.  Make fresh rice for it, though.

Avocado & Lime Chicken Tacos

After I make something annoying and complicated, I make tacos the next day.  This is because

a) I can only handle making a tedious meal every other day

b) We usually have leftover produce and protein that needs to be eaten up.

c) Tacos are delicious.

This is not a recipe- more of a process.

1.  Start with a package of corn tortillas.  CORN.  Flour tortillas are bullshit. Try to get ones that are made in your town for maximum fresh.

2.  Next, marinate or fancy up some kind of protein you have around.  Here, I used a package of skinless thighs I got from Costco- about a pound.  We squeezed some lime juice on to them, added a little oil (cause they were skinless), cayenne, salt, and cumin.  Then we sauteed them in small chunks until they were done.

3.  Make your tacos.  Fill them with whatever you want—- tonight we had avocado, cilantro, plain yogurt, and salsa.  With refried beans and fruit.